i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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