Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
