I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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