i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
