ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
