I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
