Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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