C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
