A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
