I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
The Olympian is in my bed
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
