did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
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