First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
