Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
