i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
