if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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