somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Randomize
