are you so shy because you have an std?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Randomize
