We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
