After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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