I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
