His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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