Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
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