You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Randomize