i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
