he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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