My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Where did you get a picture of my penis
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
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