I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
