That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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