I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
