people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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