I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
My vagina just recognized that song.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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