I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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