i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
