i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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