So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
