using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
