We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
