Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
