Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
In other news, I just burned my penis
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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