Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
