Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
