"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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