idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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