yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
