By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
