turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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