Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize