he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
