it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Randomize