U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
